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Wednesday, January 22, 2014

A New Chapter

I've cried a few times in front of S, but I've cried so so many times inside. I'm very scared of all this. Perhaps because it all is so beautiful it frightens you? My baby is so beautiful and I keep looking at him and think..can I do this? He is my responsibility now, and knowing that I took a self-decision to not use any babysitter and move into our own new house makes me wonder...why was I so brave to decide to? I'm crying (again) as I'm typing this and I'm just hoping that writing here would lighten myself a little. Shahmeer peed on me twice and I panicked so much. But then he smiled at me, and his smile meant just the world to me. And so I thought, this all can be very stressful, or can be very cute and funny and beautiful knowing that this creature will pee or even poo on me many more times in the future. It all depends on how we wanna perceive it, and I say...I'm gonna enjoy all this. Life feels so new - and weird - but I'm very much excited.

32 comments:

Ambar Sulistyowati said...

menjadi ibu adalah anugerah terbesar buat perempuan,, gak mudah tapi pasti bisa dijalani, membesarkan adik Shahmeer menjadi anak soleh dan bermanfaat seperti ibunya aminn :)selamat dan semangattt kk diana :D

Ambar Sulistyowati said...

menjadi ibu adalah anugerah terbesar buat perempuan,, gak mudah tapi pasti bisa dijalani, membesarkan adik Shahmeer menjadi anak soleh dan bermanfaat seperti ibunya aminn :)selamat dan semangattt kk diana :D

Ambar Sulistyowati said...

menjadi ibu adalah anugerah terbesar bagi perempuan. gak mudah, tapi pasti bisa dijalani, membesarkan adik Shahmeer menjadi anak soleh dan bermanfaat seperti ibunya :) selamat dan semangatt kk diana :D

Dyta Marcelia said...

Wanna see the baby so bad! :D Congratulations by the way :))

Namira Kinski said...

congrats for the new born :)

Unknown said...

Hihihihi semangat Kak! Me as your faithful reader is also feel happy for you :D May you baby brings you and your husband a bunch of happiness in the future. I bet he must be cool in few years later when he's grow up. Just like you. Cool and different :) Good luck, Mom!

siti masyitah said...

update foto baby-nya dong kak Di... <3 <3

Eka Patriargadani said...

Good luck Kak di. You can do it :)
Everytime you've feeling down just look at shahmeer eyes. And everything will be okay :)

Http://ekaneechan.blogspot.com

Karina Dinda R. said...

Kak aku terharu dan ikut seneng! Sekali lagi selamat ya kak :) Semoga kakak dan keluarga selalu dilindungi Allah SWT :)

Join my Mini Giveaway, win lots of cute and pretty fashion stuff. Open worldwide till January 27th. Click here.
Cheers,
Karina Dinda R. ♥
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inezdiva said...

being a mom is the best thing in life lho kak, be grateful everytime :D
Oh btw, congrats on ur baby birth kak

Anonymous said...

Assalam kak diana, I havent been reading your blog for a while now. And suddenly you have a baby! I'm so happy for you, I truly am. I hope that everything will be fine and insyaAllah, He will truly help you through this :)

I hope that my humble comment may bring a smile on your face :) Have a good day kak diana!

lots of love from me, Yana
Malaysia

annestie ariani said...

diana,saya juga a new mom. my baby is 4 months old :) minggu2 pertama saya juga rajin bgt nangis.ngerasa "duh bisa ga ya jd ibu yg baik utk malaikat kecil ini?". blm lagi *maaf* puting yg luka karna posisi menyusui yg blm pas shingga pas bayinya nyusu (saya asi ekslusif), saya gigit bibir nahan sakit. yg bikin saya kuat adalah kata2 ibu saya, bahwa "Allah menitipkan seorang anak kepada saya berarti Allah yakin saya dan suami sudah siap". semangat ya diana.kamu pasti bisa.bykin doa dan zikir yaaa. semangaaatttt!!!

Unknown said...

u can do this precious thing all kak di! i support u too.. kak di will be a better mom for him.
oh btw, whats his name? hehe

ephy scarf said...

hm, jadi keingat hampir empat tahun yang lalu, begitu anak lahir, pindah rumah, gak tinggal sama ortu lagi, gak pai baby sitter, gak ada prt, dan suami sakit...
hm..
semoga tetap kuat, Kak.
Dilancarkan dan dimudahkan Allah SWT selalu...

amiin...

ephy

inanda said...

Hi Di! congrats for your baby. He looks so handsome (i saw him at your IG).
I'm a new mom too, and ever felt the same way like you do right now. Cried a lot, worry much, and very emotional.
Ask Sharjeel to cooperate with you in taking care Shahmeer. Give your time to take a nap and have a good food.
and believe me, it just "baby blues" syndrome, and it will end after you feel and understand your new "life rhythm".

Be strong, In Shaa Allah, everything will be alright soon.
*Kiss kiss for baby Shahmeer*

Anonymous said...

Hello Diana...what a nice writing..i always love the way you write..words by word..

First of all, congratulation for the baby born and new house, wish you a very happy life ahead.

i found my eyes teary as long as i read these..i am about 4 months married and honestly not ready yet to have a baby, because i think it will really changes my life..but reading this such enlightening me..okay, everything will be change but that would be fun too just like you said - It all depends on how we wanna perceive it.

Thank you, Diana..send a huge hug to lovelu Shahmeer and say hi also to your beloved Sharjeel..God bless you three..Thanks again :)


Love,

your loyal reader

fransiscaayu said...

become a mom is a great gift from God kak. I believe you can be the best mom for Shahmeer. Semangat kak :)

fransiscaayu said...

become a mom is a great gift from God. I believe you will be the best mom for Shahmeer. Semangat kak di <3

Unknown said...

hidup tiba2 berubah menjadi 360 derajat.
welcome to the new world baby...

Unknown said...

kehidupan berubah drastis 360 derajat.dan ga ada istirahatnya..
welcome to the new world..

Anonymous said...

Congratulations for the three of you now..
I also worried about everything after delivering my baby boy. I was so scared about everything. Can i be a good mom, will he be a good person, will he stays healthy, will he be happy even though his parents did not have so much money, and all that stuff.. But hey, I've read that worries is a good sign. It is a sign that you have that awareness.
And also, if our mom can do it, so do we. AMEN.
Love to you and your little family.. stay strong!

Oenoel said...

Hi Diii... I know you can do it.... You're a stong and perfect woman.... Pasti akan selalu ada up n down moment... tp itu biasa bukan di hidup... you're very positive person... gw yakin loe pasti bisa melewati semuanya :)... tetap semangaat yaaah... :) ...

Pixelhazard said...

I'm 3 months in, at home by myself with the hubby at home. It's tough but so worth it when you see that smile huh? I got peed on too and in my shock I screamed out a little too loud and poor bubba started screaming his lungs out. Some things take getting used to huh?

X. pixelhazard | Bright Green Laces |

Anonymous said...

As a new mum myself, all alone in a city, I am solely responsible for my son. It is a scary thought, and sometimes, unbearably hard, but I believe that the second God blessed you with Shahmeer, He also gave you strength and resilience that only mothers have :) Trust that HE won't give you more that you can't handle. Noone ever says that motherhood is easy, however, all the pain and tears and tiredness is worth it. Good luck, D! :)

Arfahani Arsad said...

congrats kak Di! Shahmeer is so handsome, I guess the DNA is so well matched,hehe.. all the best of becoming a great mom! much love from Malaysia :) *flying kiss*

Cinta Ruhama Amelz said...

dear di, i think you're going to be a wonderful mother. deep down i know you know that too, just don't be too hard on yourself :) i think that's the key. sebentar lagi aku nyusul kamu :D let's support each other shall we? :D

love,
tara

Vania Aprilia said...

good luck in being a mom :) just enjoy every step!


Love,
Pudding Monster

Ardra said...

Hai Kak Di, congratulation on your handsome baby boy. You are very inspirational to me, the fact that you're not hiring a baby sitter when everyone else is, is really admirable. Don't worry, you cry a lot means you care which is good, right? You can get trough this, this too shall pass they said, this is probably because it's still new, you haven't got used to it. You will get used to it eventually. XX

Insert Ins' Art said...

CONGRATULATION, KAK D!!!!
maaf telat..

aaaaaah.... ikut terenyuh bacanya. SEKALI LAGI SELAMAT!! :")

Kusuma Dewi said...

i feel exactly the same - i think every new mom feel the same way too :D

now my 1st baby is 3.5 year old and im 33 week pregnant

welcome to motherhood all the best wishes for you Diana :D

Summer Heartbeat said...

can't believe that i actually have been following u since u were still dating Sharjeel until baby shahmeer. Happy for u!

Unknown said...

congratulation Diana,
kalo inget waktu itu 2 kali sempat senam hamil barengan sama diana dan sama sekali gak berani negor. trus setelah habis lahiran, kontrol ke dokter periksa jahitan, liat diana dan suami lagi periksa juga di rs premier, gak berani negor juga.
akhirnya lahir juga baby boy, selamat, sudah jadi ibu.
mungkin kalo nanti ketemu lagi, nanti saya berani negor. haha...

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