Friday, May 25, 2012

When Life Hits You

Life is amazing, because it hits you and hugs you within seconds. And in a minute, you learn something big, something new, something eye-opening. That life, moves quickly, and forward. And the only thing to do, is to enjoy the moments while we can, and to believe, that everything, once again, happens for a reason.

I have been very lucky, and happy, and grateful, to find out around 8 weeks ago, that I am pregnant. Yes! I'm pregnant! The BEST news S and I have received so far as a married couple. My family and friends were also very happy for us, and we planned so many things to make sure that all goes well. Don't do this, don't do that, must eat this, must not eat that, you know the drill. This has also been the reason why I haven't been blogging that often lately. Because I have morning sickness which in reality feels more like a day-and-night sickness hehehe...

But, the universe decided otherwise. Just 4 days ago, S and I discovered that we lost our baby. When I went for the checkup, the doctor could no longer hear his/her heartbeat. I knew it somehow. Like how I knew before any pregnancy test taken that I was pregnant, just the day before that last checkup, I knew my baby was in trouble. If someone asks me what actually happened, or what did the doctor say in detail, I'm not sure myself because I kinda lost a bit of my hearing when the doctor was explaining to me the sad news. All I know is that my baby died, and I responded the doctor with just one word. "Okay", I said.

All it took was a walk around the hospital, and some time inside the hospital's toilet to cry and just accept the fact. And I called S, cried again, and that was the last time I dropped a tear. I am okay now. We are okay...:)

It's sad to know that something had lived and died inside me. But I always believe that Allah is kind, and this, for whatever reason, was for the best.

So yes. Life is amazing, because it hits you and hugs you within seconds. And in a minute, you learn something big, something new, something eye-opening. That life, moves quickly, and forward. Stay positive, people...God is always kind...:)

xoxo,
Diana

111 comments:

Melinda C. Lewerissa said...

Yang sabar ya, Diana. This post got me smiling and crying all at once. Stay positive and happy for you and hubby. Go has great plans. All in good time.

Keenan said...

Kak Di, there's no wise words I could say right now.. Because I know, you are a strong woman. I could only send prayers to your little family. God bless you and S, kak Di. :)

dddeer said...

Kak D, yang sabar ya. Everything happens for a reason :)

shea said...

Oh my Diana... be strong yah dearie! Allah knows best and for sure he'll grant you more blessings in the near future knowing that you are such a kind-hearted person.. Never stop making Dua for him..

Stay happy as you always are! :)

xx,
Shea
(My Amethyst)

mariah said...

Hey. I'm been reading your blog for almost 2 years. I just watch it from far. But upon hearing this news, I just want to drop 'takziah' note. I'm so sorry for what had happened, though I might not be able to relate it to myself, but I know it is so painful. May ALLAH ease your life okay? I'll pray for you. :)

mariah said...

Hey! I'm been reading your blog for almost 2 years. But I don't have the gut to comment, until now. I just watch it from far (literally). HAHHA. Upon hearing this sad news, I just wanna drop a 'takziah' note. La Tahzan sis! Surely, ALLAH has keep something, could be better for you. I'll pray for it. :)

Cindy Karmoko said...

so sorry to hear that ka, i'm sure you'll be a good mom someday. i'll pray for you, your health and of course your hubby too!! my mom almost aborted me (accidentally) when i was about 10 weeks old, but i'm here right now! *bigHUG*

http://hippiegonemad.blogspot.it/

hanny arianty gultom said...

sorry to hear that Die.. ;( God has set the right time for you and S.. be tough ya Die.. :)xoxo

Anonymous said...

Be strong kak Diana...
its a lie if i said i know how you feel, cuz i don't.but just by reading your thoughts, i feel a pain inside of me.
i only know you from reading your blog for the past few years, and i think you are such a wonderful person and i believe you gonna be a great mother.
but like what you said, God must have a bigger plans for your life, we just can't figure it out just yet.
i wish you all the best in life kak Di
and please don't be scared..
don't be scared to cry..its okay, don't be scared to have another baby..and another one after :)

Marla Singer said...

I'm so sorry to hear that, Diana :'(
As a mother myself, I know how painful it is if something happened with my baby.
God has another plan for you. Be strong ya :)

Cliff Tuna said...

I don't know what to say ka diana, but I really wish that I can hug you right now... so I guess here's my virtual hug for you okay? *hugsssssss* and a kiss too muah! Sometimes I can't believe that there is someone who is so cheerful yet strong and mature and wise like you.

Anonymous said...

we will never know why some bad things happened...but if we try to think from a different perspective..maybe it will make things a little bit better.

so i found this quote : "an angel in the Book of Life wrote down my baby's birth & whispered as she closed the Book: "Too beautiful for this Earth"

i'm sory i don't know what to say, i just want to put a smile in your face :)

Anonymous said...

halo :) am your silent reader for around two years, and got a lil' bit shocked knowing what happened to you. it's a total lie if i said 'i feel you' coz i've never been there. all i can say: keep smiling and rocking the world! :))

xoxo

Angel said...

Im sorry for this news, but these things happen and we sometimes don't know why. I hope you guys recover well.

selly octavia said...

So sorry to hear that di.. I know your a strong woman.. I may not know how you feel.. But one thing I know for sure is that Allah got another plan for you and S.. The most beautiful one.. :)

selly octavia said...

So sad to hear that dii.. I may not know how you feel about that.. But I know one thing for sure is that Allah have other plan for you and S.. The most beautiful one indeed., you might juat have to be patient and pray.. Hope the best for you dii.. I know you're the strong woman..

Olen Riyanto said...

stay strong ya kak. God can be quite mysterious when it comes to His plans.

lots of hugs :)

Spin said...

Diana, lots of love to you.

Atikah Nadhifah said...

I'm sorry to hear that kak diana. wish you all the best kak :D

allah known the best for us :)

Shapeme said...

probably u heard that many many times, but u r really strong. for me u r the strongest person in the world now. i know it can be just a empty word for someone but for me, at this moment, u r the strongest person. Wish u good luck, u and S :) Love u :)

Anonymous said...

I'm your biggest fan, Kak Di... Semangat terus ya kak. Allah pasti ngasih jalan yang terbaik buat keluarga Kak Di. Dibalik semuanya pasti ada hikmahnya kak. Love u kak Di:*

aldilafiramdania said...

Oh my God kak Diana ceritanya sama persis kayak kakak ku :( And I really sad to know that its pending for me to be an aunty! :( keep stronger kak Di. You are not alone :')

ratie said...

Oh my.. It must be hurtful, di.. It was also my nightmare as a mother, losing my child.. But remember, Allah wouldn't give someone a burden if he/she can't hold it. This is just a phase to make you a more stronger woman. Take care, di.. Smile, would you? :)

Syifa Azz said...

kak dii, be patient ok! Allah have other better way to kak di and your family.. sure.

honeysweety said...

sabar ya kak diana, tetep semangat .

Novianty Effendy said...

berpikir positif dan selalu bersyukur kak diana :)
don't give up kak :D

Bayu Hidayat said...

Turut berdukacita ya.sabar.pasti Allah udah rancang jalan terbaik di balik ini semua

nellaindri said...

i have a breakfast when i read your post.. you know, when i read second paragraph , i feel very very happy, but the third paragraph, suddenly i stopped my breakfast.
Diana, icould only pray for you and S.. be great woman :)

Tara said...

I read your post this morning diana when I had just woken up via mobile. I read one by one from start to finish. And I can feel what you feel, everyone would have felt lost. Diana do not worry, there are always lessons to be drawn from each of what we experience. Maybe this is not the time and God will give the right time for you and Sharjeel to have children. Keep smiling and stay positive.Cheers Up! :)

Anonymous said...

Kak D, I'm sorry to hear that :( I'm sorry you lost your baby :(
I can't imagine what you're gonna been through.
I will send my prayer to you :) God bless you, kak D! :) Cheer up! :)

;) said...

oh, sorry to hear that news.
im sure everything happen for a reason.

im sure He'll grant your wish to have baby soon.
take care!!

Vivid Virginia said...

That's so really true ka,everything happens for a reason and God is always kind to us just keep believing :)

Anonymous said...

my mom lost my older sister years ago. mommy said that's okay cause later in heaven, there's someone who pick her up and smile for her

Dera said...

kak Diana... tetaplah percaya dan ceria...
bersyukur ada suami dan keluarga serta teman yang selalu meyayangimu...
hanya percaya dan bersyukur...:)

Dera said...

kak Diana... tetaplah percaya dan ceria...
bersyukur ada suami dan keluarga serta teman yang selalu meyayangimu...
hanya percaya dan bersyukur...:)

ANANDITA PRISCARINI said...

be strong kak di :)

Ana Valera said...

Honey, be strong. Here in the other side of the world (Brazil), we're praying for you! Everything gonna be fine!!!

Ana Valera said...

Honey, be strong. Here in the other side of the world (Brazil), we're praying for you! Everything gonna be fine!!!

Claude C Kenni said...

In life God doesn't give you the people you want, instead He gives you the people you need. To teach you, to hurt you, to love you, and make you exactly the way you should be.

Eventually all the pieces will fall into place, until then... laugh at the confusion, live for the moment and know that everything happens for a reason.

Be strong =)

Adelia Budiarto said...

so sad to hear that kak di, stay strong :D

Haliem Yaya said...

Hugs kak Di. Allah with us.
Pasti akan dapet ganti yg lbh baik :)

Adelia Budiarto said...

so sad to hear that kak di, stay strong :D

Jessica Xu said...

Oh my, I'm so sorry to hear that! Be strong, Di. You have to always remember that God has a better plan for you!

Mica said...

I am so so sorry to hear that you lost your baby, what a horrible experience for you :(

Wulan Kartikasari said...

Well,I'm speechless. You're the happiest person on Earth I've ever seen. I never thought this terrible thing could happened to you. be strong, He is planning something bigger and better for you :')

Stella said...

You are a strong woman and you can face this well, I'm sure. For everything that happened, there's always reason behind. There's a new lesson of life that God wants to put in you, to make you stronger, better. I wish both of you the best, D&S :)

Vika Vinessa said...

stay strong kak Di.. :)
we believe that you can go through this.. :)

Fradita Wanda Sari said...

Sabar ya, kakak. Senang banget baca di awal, tapi sedih pas di akhir. Semoga kakak sama suami kuat terus ya. Amin :')

Mei めい said...

yang sabar ya kak :)

http://japobsganbare.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

You're so strong, Kak Di. Stay positive. I love you. <3

iegha said...

I'm tearing up now... Not only because you have lost a baby but how you handle that. I know someone who lost her baby just in a day she give birth. Hurt & Painful. So yes, something happen for a reason.

And, the late-baby becomes your saving 'there' that will always pray for your goodness here and 'there'. You'll get another one soon ;) Amien.

You both are fine and always will be ;)

Larasati Lestari said...

I'm sorry to hear that Diana. Be strong ^^.

♥ Lauretha of Myrrh Goldframe ♥ said...

I'm sorry to hear about the news. :( .in the past My mother had often lost her babies for three times before i was born, she kept believing that God loves us in a very special way. I'm her only child, and happy to be loved. And yes, there's nothing impossible in this universe if we keep believe on prayin and grateful for life. Kisses and Hugs for you,dear.

when milk meet tea said...

be strong dear .

AstyNNS said...

Dear Diana, saya jg pernah mengalami hal yg sama thn 2010, baby yg telah kami nantikan selama 2 th pernikahan akhirnya hrs diikhlaskan. Tapi Alhamdulillah skrg sy sudah hamil lagi jalan bulan ke enam. Allah SWT maha mengetahui apa yg terbaik bagi hambanya, stay positive :D

Fetty Asihta Kencana Putri said...

So sorry to hear that kak Di. :'(
But I'm sure Allah have a beautiful plan for you and S. Be strong, stay healthy, and cheerful as you always did. Allah will help you. :)
*hugs*

quirky jelly said...

be strong kak Di :') I knew its really hard accepted. My older sister lost her 1st baby too. I'm inappropriate to say this, but I knew how's the feeling lost. even I'm not pregnant yet, but I'd already felt it like my own family. my own niece....

berbahagialah kak Di, karena kak Di udah punya tabungan di surga, your baby is waiting you on the heaven's door :))

love you <3

anisizatyA.J said...

Im so sorry for your loss :( be strong, good things will always happen if we are patient. lots of hugs

Dea said...

Be strong... I guess this is the best way that God has chosen this path for you

Bunga said...

Glad to hear you're ok now. Stay strong, stay happy, a better future must be waiting for you, S, and the whole family.


*hugs*

Blair's Bazaar said...

Dear Diana. I dont want to be sorry for you because like you said, you're ok now. Instead, I pray for you to be blessed again with a baby, soon :) Amin..

AN3 said...

i'm really really sorry to hear that kak diii:_) i read them words by words and i can feel what you feel, i can feel your sadness, but i know you're strong:_D remember kak, Allah give us problem because Allah knows that we can figure it out, right? me love you so much kak di, may Allah bless you:) :*


http://finalexpectation.blogspot.com/

Annisa mulia said...

Innallaha ma'a ash-shobirin, kak Di..
Allah bersama orang-orang yang sabar :)

Mia said...

I'm so sorry for your lost Kak Di, stay strong 'cause Allah will lead you to have another baby with S. Don't lose hoping:D

TiaraAle said...

feel really really bad, but i am glad that you're okay, i know you're a strong woman, :) be strong kak :) after this problem there must be something good that waiting for you :) just keep doing the good things,,

mafiga norrais said...

sad :( I know youre strong kak ! stay positive ^^ Allah <3 us forever

tik tok said...

i'm so sorry Kak Di....but,maybe you know 'life must go on',keep strong,keep spirit !

z said...

i usually only monitor ur new posts but hearing this news somehow i feel sad though i dont know u in person but i bet ur a great and strong woman and surely something better is waiting ahead for u and ur husband. i'm sorry to hear the news but yes past is the past, more blessing are about to come. cheer up kak diana:):) x

Princess Monica said...

kak dianaaaaa :'(
aku ikut shock :'(

The Frocker said...

I'm so sorry, Diana. I hope that in time your heart will heal, and that the plans that God has for you and S will become clearer. I will keep you and your family in my heart and pray for you.

Stella Lunardy said...

I'm sorry to hear that kak Di. yang sabar ya kak, Cheer up! :)

Rina said...

I am so sorry to hear that Kak D.. Just believe it's the best plan from Allah. I wish you and Mr. S can accept this with a big heart. Allah bless your little family always! xoxo

InMyLife said...

Dianaa..semoga Allah memberikan yang terbaik ya Di..itu tandanya DIA sayang sekali sama kamu dan suami. selamat naik kelas ya Di. Both of u are the chosen one..anakmu menanti di surga kelak..:) amin.

Adeline Yang said...

I'm sorry to hear that... but I salute you that you can still be greatly thankful to God for whatever happened in your life... not a lot of people can do that. So, yes, just believe this is for the best. God will give you the best. He will. And we just know it :) Be strong!

Minnie said...

I am sorry to hear the news dear. Hope you recover soon , be strong... just as what you said. everyhing happen for reason!

Kisses!
Minnie

miund said...

I'm very sorry to hear the news. Stay strong, Diana.

chikinritoruuu said...

be patient kak diana, even though i never meet you and i haven't be a mother. i know what loss feel. but i'm sure that God have other plan for you and you will be a great mother in the future :-) *hug*

elenaputri.blogspot.com

qdaffy said...

yg sabar sis

siti masyitah said...

Yang sabar ya, mba. yang penting sekarang tetap jaga aktivitas fisik dan mental, jangan kecapean, dan jaga makanan.

Diana Rikasari said...

Thank you very very very much for all your prayers, support and warm wishes, everyone...I truly truly truly appreciate it. LOVE YOU, ALL! :)

Mitha Komala said...

i cant relate to how you felt 4 days ago. but deep down i know that it must be so painful and caused a wound.

but i really hope, with all my heart, that you are feeling good and happy about life now. because you deserve every bits of joyfulness.

most people, i know, would blame the universe if the similar thing happened to them. but i know you are not. you are strong enough to handle everything that happened. because as what you said, everything happens for a reason.

i want to tell you that everything is temporary and life goes on. i am sure that whenever a tree loses a leaf, a new leaf grows in its place. it might be stormy now, but it cant rain forever. so enjoy life for now and let the chips fall where they may. i hope you will find your happiness back kak dii. may God always be with you, your husband, and your whole family.

lots of love,
Letters To Juliet

amanda said...

one thing you shud know... you inspire people. your positivity and kindness and your cheerfulness, i mean, we dont see girls (scratch that, women) like you anymore nowadays, u know?? and did you know that there are people --strangers!-- actually praying for you?

dont be discouraged, keep posting happiness, and just remember, when u're facing a trial like this, its NOT the end. God always listens to ur prayers, and He has something big in store for you!

you have caring fans all over the world, and also (i'm sure) a very blessed and loving family. tetap cmungudh pkoknyah!!! ;)

fhenny said...

have just know about this kak,
hope you will stay strong.
I believe God will make everything beautiful in his time, not ours.
Sending my prayer to you *hugs*

xoxo
style frontier

Mulan Ranagradis said...

keep patient and positive ,Kak we will always support you :)

http://mulanranagradis.blogspot.com

Lina said...

I have been your reader on and off throughout the years and this is the first time i write a comment here.

I just wanna say Be strong and stay positive. God Bless you~

rika daniel said...

so sorry to hear, Diana, but Allah knows the best for us :)

S▲SH▲ SY▲IF▲NI said...

hello kak diana :)
I'm so proud of you that you could patient through this test from Allah. I really amazed and embarrassed. I'm amazed because you could patient through this problem, If i were you, maybe I'm in depressed. Why? I'm 13, kak di. and i never patient if i have problem. this thing always hit me. kak di aja yang punya cobaan sebesar ini bisa sabar, kenapa aku yang punya masalah anak smp biasa aja nggak bisa sabar?
Kak di, your post really inspired me.
tetep sabar ya kak!

Sasha, dari Surabaya.

Adis said...

I'm so sorry to hear that.
You know, I've been married for 1.5 years and have never felt pregnant.
Although I always think positive there is still a sense of envy to a pregnant woman. Feelings of sadness and despair, sometimes up to hate, but then realized and felt ashamed.
I don't know which is more sad. Waiting or missing.
May be missing, because been through the stage of waiting.
Lying if I said I know how you feel. But I genuinely sympathetic.
It was nice to have you feel fine :)
Right now I'm hating my best friend. Not always, just when she told me, or show off her pregnancy.
Even though aware of the feeling that one, inevitably I always feel hurt and crying.
Sorry, I shouldn't talk like this. I should cheer you.
I just wish I couldn't just positive thinking but also can feel it and be brave like you.
Honestly, sometimes you're my inspiration and possibly others.
So stay strong not only for yourself and your family, but also for us ;D

Carla said...

one day in ur live, someday always happy, luck n everthing looks alright but someday always bad, sad and no more luck...
but U must to Believe n strong b coz life must go on Sis

Hanna Kusumawaty said...

God has 3 answers for every prayer
1. Yes
2. Yes, but not now
3. I have a better plan for you

there's never a NO, be strong kak! :-)

Hanna Kusumawaty said...

God has 3 answers for every prayer
1. Yes
2. Yes, but not now
3. I have a better plan for you

there's never a NO, be strong kak :-)

@raynamarchyiane said...

i can't say anything except stay strong, don't cry and.. keep praying.

xx
http://raynamarchyiane.blogspot.com

Destiny Next Door said...

Be strong Kak D, be strong and the time of love will come soon! Lots of love xoxo.

Eka said...

Diana .. yang sabar yaaa ...
aku pernah seperti itu waktu hamil anak ke-2, ga ada detak jantung di bulan ke-4 ... Tuhan punya rencana yang lebih indah pasti. 3 bulan kemuadian aku hamil lagi .. he's 2.5 YO now

keep smiling 'n inspiring as always :)

Joan Shannon said...

So sad to hear that Di,
be patient, Allah has his perfect timing..

May Allah bless you and family and He'll give you the chance to have baby again soon :)

love ya...

Ellen said...

Oh my Di... It hurts me to hear the news :( I can't imagine the amount of pain u must have felt at that time. I've never experienced what u went through but I had some complication after delivery, including the abilities I take for granted everyday, such as urinating (sorry if it's too vulgar) and I lost that ability for 3 months. My schedule was filled with hospital visit every other day, endless medication & equipment insertion. I was so desperate at that time. Thank God I gradually recovered later on. Thankfully my family also never stopped supporting me at that time. Now I learn to never take anything for granted, and my family is my first and foremost priority.

I know u're a strong woman. And Allah will never put u on something more than what u can endure. Keep praying, keep faithful n u'll be a mother in no time :) stay healthy n stay positive yah Di. My biggest hug for u...

karmel said...

I haven't been following your posts for a while, but I am happy to find that you are you even when I'm not looking and even after big things like marriage and pregnancy happens.

Congratulations with the decision to become parents. I am so sorry to learn of your loss, but I believe as you that there must have been a reason. Happy to know that you and S have a loving family and each other. Take care of each other.

Anonymous said...

sabar yaa kak dianaa :) everything gonna be oke okee heheh

Rumah Murah diJual Tangerang

glam the glory said...

i hope you're doing fine and stay healthy..your positive thoughts always keeping me on track..so just want u to know i love u and pray the best for ur family :)

chieliciouz said...

Be strong kak Di.. as we know, God always HIS own way to prove how BIG is HE.
And sure, you will get the cutest baby, in HIS right time.
*hug you*

Anonymous said...

This happened to my sister-in-law as well. For no particular reason she lost her baby. But guess what? Her next pregnancy, she was blessed with twins. A baby boy and a baby girl. God is good. And I'm glad you didn't lose faith in Him. He won't let anything happen without a reason.

Cupid Fazza said...

http://indonesiafashionhijab.blogspot.com/

Smile You Don't Cry, You are not alone

Dina Rosita said...

sabar ya mbak, pasti diberi yang lebih lagi :)

Nuha said...

I feel like giving you big hug, reading your post made me tear up. *BEAR HUG*

arlitaayu said...

be strong Kak Di...Semoga diberikan yg terbaik sama Yang Maha Kuasa...Amiiiin...:D

Renata said...

kakak cantik yang blognya selalu saya baca, be strong yaaa :)

Obat herbal diabetes mellitus said...

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Erlinda "Miss Little Town" said...

*hugs* One big hug, the only thing I can offer to my all-time favourite blogger.

ARIO ACHDA said...

oh my...
i was almost jumping by the first two paragraphs, then i stopped by the first line from the third paragraph.

My sister had the same thing the first time she was pregnant, they said its an empty pregnancy, black ovum or something, so maybe i know how u felt...and i'm really sorry to hear this...

I have to say, i love the way you write things...you always sums things up in an inspiring way...
Stay strong as you've always been

angelinacrystalia said...

OMG..... The first time i read it i thought that you have a perfect life and flawless. But i dont have the words in my head when i read it. Just stay strong, God always have a beautiful plans for us :)

putri said...

Im sorry for your loss Diana, stay strong. Just like what you said, always be positive.

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